Destination Unknown

For everyone, there comes a time when we have to resort to a more expensive service than the typical, whether it be photocopying, picture-taking, purchases, mail deliveries, dining, or something similar.

For students, or graduates, we all experienced going to the nearby Xerox shop to get our documents photocopied. Typically, a student here in the Philippines spends 50 cents (no, not the rapper) to photocopy per page. The most expensive one, at least at stores near school, cost P1, and usually, it looks almost identical to the original document, with the exception of the photocopied one being black and white.

Last Tuesday, I was out to apply for a job when I realized that I need to submit two, not one, copy of my resume. Since I only brought 1 resume, I had no choice but to photocopy at National Bookstore (henceforth abbreviated as NB), whose photocopier service is notorious for being more expensive than the norms.

Never did I realize how bureaucratic a photocopier service can actually be. NB’s photocopy process flows very slowly that I can’t help but wonder why they made the process flow very unconventional. When a customer wants to photocopy certain documents, s/he first need to get the operator to sign up some kind of a purchase invoice indicating how may copies of a document will be photocopied. The customer then proceeds to the cashier to pay for the photocopy service, which cost for a minimum of P1.50 per page. It is after s/he has paid and secured a receipt that s/he can actually get the operator to photocopy a document. In contrast of the NB, the typical photocopier needs only to photocopy immediately the document requested by the customer, then ask for payments. That greatly reduces time spent on doing one process NB charges higher for.

It can also get pretty frustrating when a customer have to queue in a very long line, of which NB is very well known to have. At almost all times, the cashier transacts like a noxious person on a 1:00 afternoon. The service of the photocopy operator is pretty substandard as well. Upon waiting for my document to get photocopied, a customer in front of me was actually complaining about how the operator lost the customer’s original document. The operator merely hemmed and hawed, not taking responsibility for any of his lapse. As a consequence, the customer proceeded to see the manager, which needs to be screened first by the information counter. I don’t think I’ll ever find out what fate befalls the customer’s original documents and to what end her complaints have reached. It could’ve been a passport. Imagine losing your passport, your re-entry documents, your Alien Certificate of Registration, your driver’s license, your ID, birth certificates among thousand of other important documents, to some inept operator of a photocopier of a nationwide’s "best" bookstore. It’s no wonder why I miss Barnes and Noble so much.

Lastly, after I got my resume photocopied, I noticed yet another flaw. The copy of my resume is tilted at one side.

I’m definitely not going to get any documents photocopied at NB again.

For being back almost 1 week, I opened up the newspaper to see whether the latest artful (and spectacular) movies from the states are also showing here.

Instead, I’m seeing a couple of a really stupidly named Filipino movies out in the cinemas.

In addition to those two (which wil be the first 2 of the list), I’m also going to write down other Filipino movies whose title I think are pretty lame.

-Ispiritista: Itay, may moomoo! (english translation: Spiritist: That, there’s a ghost)
Comment: I will definitely say this title is an attempt to parallel The Exorcist, but what’s with preceding an i before the spiritista? Do we also say istapober instead of stopover? Do we also say iskwater instead of squatter? and what’s with the stupid tagline?

-Ilusyon
Comment: Please, just call it illusion! And boy, are filipino cinemas being overcropped with horror movies? What are the studios trying to do: jump into the horror movie bandwagon re-popularized by Japan and Korea?

-Spirit Warriors: The Short Cut. Follow me (yes, that includes follow me)
Comment: The Short Cut?! Couldn’t they have just named it Spirit warriors? What does the short cut have anything to do with Spirit warriors? And why the additional slogan of follow me? Granted, this might be related to the movie, but dang I wish they could’ve just named it differently altogether.

-Sex Drive
Comment: I saw this one coming. Ah, what the heck, i’ll just group the bad movie titles together. My comments are pretty much the same for each anyway.
-Bedtime Stories
-Talong (Translated as: Eggplant)
-Check Inn
-Otso-Otso: Pamela-mela Wan (8-8. I don’t know what the hell the tagline means. Apparently, they are from two stupid novelty stongs)
-Hindi ka na sisikatan ng araw (The sun won’t set on you)
-Itlog (Egg)
-Booba (Big-boobed woman)
-Weyt a minit, kapeng mainit! (Wait a minute, hot coffee! I know: it doesn’t make any sense at all!)

I’m still missing some, but I’m too tired to think of all of them right now.

I will, however, list down Filipino movie titles which I think is pretty brilliant.
-Espadang patpat (I don’t know what patpat means, but espada means sword)
-Mano po (It’s a filipno custom. I don’t know how this is translated)
-Dekada ‘97 (Decade ‘97)
-Okey ka, fairy ko (You’re ok, my fairy)
-Bridal Shower
-Munting Tinig (translated as: Small Voice)

I have to be honest here: I hate plane rides. I’m sick of it.

I don’t mean it literally - I don’t vomit while I’m on the plane, or feel dizzy. It’s just that, whenever I go from one place to another, the most uncomfortable part is always the plane ride.

That especially applies to 23 hours of being inside the plane while on the way home from a vacation that I thought was too short.

Just this Friday, my trip to the city-that-never-sleeps, ended. Far worse, my plane departs at 5:50 AM, and I’m expected to reach Philippines at 930 PM of the next day. That’s a whole lot of time travelling and not to mention, transferring. To recall, I went from Newark to Houston, then to Hawaii, then to Guam, and then to Philippines. that’s 20+ hours of being seated at the not-so-comfortable seating of Boeing airplanes, climbing over seatmates (because I wasn’t assigned at the aisle seats) whenever I want to take a leak, eating so-much-lesser version of all those fantastic foods I ate in NY, sleeping with a blindfold wrapped uncomfortably at my ear, trying to read "The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath" when I lost sleep, hearing babies cry, and listening to ear-grating noises of jet engines. Who likes those kind of experience anyway?

To make it even worse, the movie, Madagascar, was played just to remind me of the beautiful city I’ve just left. I saw in the movie all the places I’ve visited, loved, and will miss! There’s the Central Park Zoo, the Time Square, the Rockefeller Skating Rink, and the Grand Central Train Station. Heck, the animators even depicted in full CG glory the streets of Madison Avenue, down to the subway of 59th Street Lexington Avenue - the station nearest the place where I live. I almost wanted to throw tomatoes at the flight attendants who thought of playing this movie!

Worse of all, that’s 20+ hours of time and date transitions! Before I’m even aware of it, it’s suddenly the next day, then it goes back to the previous day. Factor it with a daylight in one place and a nighttime in another, and things can get pretty confusing. SHould I say, jet lag?

Until now, I’m still experiencing jet lag, which has caused me to become so counterproductive. I sleep all afternoon, but stays awake all night.

Note for people expecting thought-provoking, controversy-themed discussions, today’s not the day.

Pretty much many unlucky stuffs happened this day, such that I don’t even want to list them down so that I’ll forget about it immediately. There pretty much isn’t so many good things that happened today, and basically, I would’ve been very pissed off. It just so happened that despite all these, I still am in high spirits. Due in part of that is because of one thing that happened today, which is an experience I can brag about the next time my homeys wondered what’s been up.

Was it because of the good selection of books my brother and I bought home from Strand? No.

Was it because today was the first time we went to Time Square? Definitely no. THis is actually my fifth time in Time Square.

BUT, it has got something to do with what happened in Time Square.

As my brother and I were wasting time waiting for our stomachs to get hungry, we saw a whole lot of people crowded in an area. We wondered what’s going on. Some of them were holding up banners of a certain celebrity. THey were all awaiting this celebrity outside the gate of Fiddler on the Roof, the show which this celebrity participated in.

We could hear her even on the outside. We’re pretty sure it was she who was singing in that broadway musical. And so we waited, and complained about how long she was taking before she finally makes an appearance.

But she eventually did appear.

And we saw Mariah Carey.