Destination Unknown

"Studying is a peculiar undertaking - loathed when performed, yearned when abandoned."

Make someone smile by forwarding this message. No, I’m not endorsing chain mails, but this one is too funny to pass up.

We’ ve been friends for a long time ago. We come from the same
alma mother. Actually, our paths crossed one time on another. But it’s
only now that I gave him a second look. I realized that beauty is in
the eyes. The pulpbits of my heart went fast, really fast. Cute pala
siya. And then, he came over with me. He said, "I hope you don’t mine.
Can I get your number?" Nag-worry ako. What if he doesn’t give it back?
He explained naman na it’s so we could eep intact daw. Sabi ko, connect
me if i’m wrong but are you asking me ouch? Nabigla siya. Sagot niya,
The! Aba ! Parang siya pa ang galit! Persona ingrata!!! Ang kapal niya!
I cried buckles of tears.

Na-guilty yata siya. Sabi niya, isipin mo na lang na this is a
blessing in the sky. Irregardless daw of his feelings, we’ll go ouch na
rin. Now, we re so in love. Mute and epidemic na ang past. Thanks God
we swallowed our fried. Kasi, I’m 33 na and I’m running our time. After
2 weeks, he plopped the question. "Will you marriage me?" I’m in a
state of shocked. Kasi mantakin mo, when it rains, it’s four! This is
true good to be true. So siyempre, I said yes. Love is a many splendor.

Kaya advise ko sa inyo -
take the risk. You can never can tell. Just burn the bridge when you
get there. Life is shorts. If you make a mistake, we’ll just pray for
the internal and external repose of your soul. I second
emotion.

I thought Jay’s ex-girlfriend was really out of our lives. But
heaven only goes that I was wrong. Kakakasal pa lang namin nun when Jay
received a uninamous text. "Meet me at the clinic." I had a stinking
feeling in my butt. I told him not to go. It might in danger him. Pero
sabi niya, ok lang daw because life is what we make. Tumahimik lang
ako. Sabi niya, Penny for you talks? But I didn’t know what to say.
Beggars can’t be losers. Isa pa, worried talaga ako na baka yung girl
yun. Jay said, "Can’t got your tongue?" I tried to smile at him. Kahit
di ako nagsalita, actions speak louder than works, di ba?

Be that as is may, umalis pa rin siya. I was out of the
loophole. After a few hours, I called him on his cellphone. But my
calls fell on Jeff’s ears. Lalo akong nag-worry kasi I didn’t even know
Jeff. Sabi na nga ba di na dapat umalis si Jay. That’s what I’m talking
about it.

So I tried calling some friends who will help me find Jay.
That’s what friends are for naman di ba? But I just faced a blank mall.
I had to do this alone. Nag-taxi na lang ako. Pero ang mahal na pala ng
plug down rate.

When I got to the clinic, the security was really buffed up.  Di
basta-basta makakapasok. So I said, I beg your cordon. I’m patient.
It’s my favorite virtue nga e.? Nagduda yata yung isang guard.
Hinawakan ako sa arm. The nerd! I shouted, Don’t touch me not! Buti na
lang the other guards were nice and said, Come on, let’s join us.

When I went inside, parang I’ve been there, done there. Nung
walang nakatingin, nag-explore ako. Nakarating ako sa top floor and I
had a bird’s IQ of the clinic. I could not explain it but I was drawn
to a room on the floor. Siguro Divine Intermission na yun.

Parang may narinig akong umuungol. I was thorn. Di ko alam kung
aalis ba ako o papasukin ko. It made me stick in the stomach to think
that Jay and his ex-girlfriend were there. I tried to tell myself to
slower my expectations. But to tell with it! I had to strike while the
iron is not. I had to hear the truth from the corpse’s mouth. I
barraged in. O my gas! Si Jay, naka-strap sa operating table, parang
genie pig sa isang nakakatakot na experiment. He was on the cutting
edge. He was bleeding. At ang doctor na nagpapahirap sa kanya, ang
ex-girlfriend niya at ang bago nitong boyfriend, ang nurse na si
Walter. Doon ko napatunayang blood is thicker than Walter.

Guess watch? Di ko alam kung paano ko nagawa pero I was able to search and rescue Jay. Siguro adrenaline brush na yun. 

Now, he’s recovering. Nag-sorry siya na hindi siya nakinig sa
akin. I know it’s a better pill to swallow your pride so it’s forgive
and forget me not. All swell that end swell. I know we should kiss and
put on makeup.

Ang ex-girlfriend naman niya at si Walter, nakakulong na.
Detention is really better than cure. So the moral of the lesson is:
if symptoms persist, insult your doctor.         

Allow me to tell you beforehand that I’m no expert of Macromedia (now Adobe) Flash; I’ve only started using this application three days ago, so I don’t claim my experiences as basis for facts. Also, if you don’t know what Flash is, please google/wiki it up.

People wondering why Flash’s name has changed from Macromedia to Adobe, here’s what happened: On December 2005, Adobe acquired Macromedia, therefore the rename; also, every Macromedia products are now also included in the latest Creative Suite (currently CS3).

I’ve worked with Flash 8 and Flash CS3, and as expected, I saw a few significant changes, some good, some bad. Take the interface. I don’t know if this is a result of the merger, but most of the tools in the Flash now appear in the same way as those from other Adobe softwares (such as Photoshop or Illustrator). The new look is clearly done to streamline all CS3’s applications, but it may confuse those who’s become very efficient with the previous interfaces (although I imagine that there are ways of switching to classic views, so it’s probably just a matter of personal idiosyncrasies/preferences).

I’m most happy with the changes done to Flash’s pen tool. There’s no other way of saying this, but the pen tool from Flash 8 sucks. Basically, pen tool is used to create Bezier curves. The problem is that Flash 8’s pen tool is ONLY capable of creating curves, so that pretty much discards conventional wisdom of what a real pen does. Speaking for myself, I like using Illustrator’s/Photoshop’s pen tool to create digital vector arts. But given the limited capabilities, I can only create irregular curves with Flash 8’s pen; I cannot create irregular shapes with unpredictable changes in contours.

Now for the good news: Flash’s CS3’s pen tool has been modified to work the same way as Illustrator’s, and that greatly ease drawing of irregular shapes. This is quite hard to explain without visual aids, but imagine this: I want to draw a number "2". In the previous version, I can’t do that with the pen tool alone: I have to draw a reversed "S", then adjust the base into a horizontal line by using the subselection tool (a very complicated process, if I may add). With Flash CS3, by adjusting the two magnetic points (they’re points that force curves, which can be modified or removed with CS3’s pen) irregular shapes can be done easily with just the pen. While it may not be quite as efficient as Photoshop’s pen tool (i.e. the line is immediately drawn, unlike in Photoshop where the pen only makes a path and what’s done with it is exactly up to the user), the upgrade saves a lot of time and trouble. As someone who loves to draw vector arts* , it’s a blessing.

In fact, with the help of the new pen tool, I have drawn a vector art of Lucy Van Pelt:

*I’ve drawn Van Gogh’s Starry Night with just the pen tool.

So I managed to survive the previous week, which had been tumultuous.

At least I can say today is the last day for the a week’s vacation
granted to students of Manila’s schools. Manila, and I imagine a huge
part of our country, suffered (or is it reveled? I’m confused like a
new member of the puberty group) from inclement weather last week. We
had typhoons for many days, and I was affected. Like how elephants hate
rats, my body wasn’t very receptive of the sudden changes in weather; I
was afflicted with sore throat, which was then immediately followed by
fever, cold and headache. Not exactly pleasant. I skipped work for a
day because of my sickness. And when I had recovered, the weather
hadn’t; the next morning as I was on my way to the office, I got so
stranded by traffics and floods that I had no choice but to call
another day off. Terrific.

I’m actually quite ticked off. I don’t like spending a week not
being in my optimal state, but I was weak given the circumstances
within and without. And thus, I’ve been unproductive, and my blog has
been neglected. Unhealthiness can really get on my nerves; I want to be
back in the state where I can appropriately say "’Scuze me while I kiss
the sky".

I’ll be back.

Since I’m in yet another dry spell, I figured this is a good
time to get reacquainted with my readers (if any) and start good vibes with by asking the common "how are you".

Work
has been monotonous and rife with politics. I have to deal with our
office
becoming a tabloid rumor mill. Funny how much people judge you based on
assumptions they have of you. I daresay how much do they know me ba?
I’m not telling them to look at themselves before singing the Eric
Clapton blues, you know, about accusing others, because I’m assuming
they’re smart enough to know that cliche and to put that into practice.
To think that "professionalism" is such a vogue word, its principle is
often elusive to those who tries to project it. And before you scream
"hypocrite" I haven’t criticized my boss (who doesn’t belong to the
rumormongers). I can’t say say the same for those band of rumormongers. Don’t they have anything better to do? I’m sorry about letting off some steam and I’m not going to do this often, but I just needed to vent.

I find my respite, during my
free time, either by blogging or by being buried in a book and being tuned out of the
surroundings. This habit led me to finish many books: 7 in total since
Harry Potter 7 got released, and I’ve yet to read Harry Potter 7.

Then there’s web design, a course I take on weekends. I thought last
week was the deadline for my web design projects. On Friday night I
meticulously applied all finishing touches, readied the project for
submission, only to learn that the instructor intended to give us a
week extension. And I slept 2AM because of FINISHING ON TIME! ARGH! As
a result of cramming, I felt groggy the whole weekend. On the brighter
side, I’m happy to announce that I’ve become
quite better at Photoshop than when I started. Our next subject is
Macromedia Flash and I can’t wait to learn that. I may even study in
advance.

Among all the work, study, and community service, I hardly have time to
play videogames. But when I have found the time, I play a few hours of
Dragon Quest VIII (which I intend to finish) and Sam and Max (the first
3 episodes I’ve beaten, and I’m currently at the 4th episode). On the
other hand, I’m less busy this week than the previous, so I’m trying as
much as I can to make this week fun-filled. As for the  7 books I’ve
just finished, I might write about them soon. My next book? Probably
Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk.

So, how are you guys doing?                              

Jealousy is such a strong word, but I admire those bloggers who get
lots of comments posted on their entries, and I wish to earn such
privilege too on my dotph blog. It’s very barren here and I could use
more excitement.

Desperate for attention, I decided to add my list of contacts to the
friends page of my dotph blog (this can be done on the Dashboard Tab
way above) so as to be able to notify-slash-annoy my friends whenever I
post new entries. Alas, because of some weird technical difficulties, I
couldn’t export my yahoo messengers’ contact to my friend’s list, so I
had to type each emails individually.

Doing that was not only toilsome, but also depressing. I don’t often
have many reasons to look at my yahoo messenger’s contacts, and I wish
I hadn’t looked today. Frankly the amount of contacts I have on my list
is just an illusion of grandeur: I’m not close to a lot of my online
friends. Only a few on my list of "friends" are people who I am willing
to be stuck with in the same elevator.

Is this their fault? No. That’s what makes it more painful. My
immediate realization is in knowing that I don’t go out enough. It’s
not that I don’t like having fun (I do), but I am so busy it’s not even
funny. I keep recalling that, way back in high school, I was a more
outgoing person and among the most adaptable to different cliques
(cliques to me are meaningless). What happened to that time? I miss
those carefree moments in my life where I can sit back, relax, kick my
feet up, and have long chats with friends.

So anyway, this is my most recent blog update. Did I end up annoying
you with this kind of whiny contents? My apologies. I still am trying,
but it’s not easy to nurture positive thoughts when I live a typical
twentysomething’s life that I despise. I wish I could ask someone out.
The world is not a playground, but having fun occasionally isn’t
so bad.

In the meantime, you can brighten up my day by posting comments.

1. What are your siblings MIDDLE names?
My brother’s "Garner". My sister doesn’t have one. I don’t know the reasons for either.

2. Where is your dad right now?
At work

3. What was the last thing you said?
I’m done

4. What is something you’ve learned about yourself recently?
I get annoyed when people don’t turn off the lights of the room they’ve just deserted.

5. What color is your watch?
Blue

6. What do you think of when you think of Australia?
I haven’t been there, so I don’t know.

7. When was the last time you squatted to pee?
Eww I don’t think I’ve ever done that!

8. Where were you at midnight last night?
At home finishing a book.

9. Are you close with your mom?
Yes

10. Where does your best friend work?
ADTX, Lufthansa, some architectural company, some programming company, and unemployed, etc.

13. What is your most attractive feature?
My innocent kind of weirdness. It’s a feature either to love or hate.

14. Do you have a roommate?
No

15. What color is your bedroom flooring?
Brown

16. Do you have a chair in your room?
Yes

17. What time of day were you born?
I got no clue

18. Do you know anyone who is engaged?
Yes. One of my best friends, in fact.

19. What’s your favorite number?
10

20. Do you know anyone named Damien?
Nope

21. What color is your mom’s hair?
Black

22. Do you have a dog?
No

24. Did anything bad happen to you in 1993?
I lost some friends and got prejudiced upon.

25. Does your first memory involve your dad?
Yes

26. Do you remember singing any songs as kids?
Yes, in fact, on a stage!

27. When was the last time you went swimming?
Last May

28. Has your luggage ever gotten lost?
Fortunately no.

29. When was the last time you talked to one of your siblings?
Just a while ago.

30. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?
Haha who, me? *winks*

31. Do you play an instrument?
I used to play the piano. Still know the keys but can’t play a good song to save my life.

32. Have you ever thought it would be cool to smash a guitar?
Not smashing them on the floor, but I thought it would be cool to smash it on someone I hate.

33. Do you like fire?
If it is to burn those stupid tabloids and corrupt government’s propagandas, fire’s dope. Otherwise, I hate it.

35. Are you allergic to anything?
I don’t know.

36. When was the last time you cried?
I don’t know.

37. What kind of shampoo do you use?
Head and Shoulders, even if I don’t have a Dandruff since last year.

38. Have you ever been to a spa?
Nope

40. Did you take science all four years of high school?
Yes, since it was mandatory

41. Do you like butterflies?
They’re okay; better than most insects.

42. What was the last book you read?
Abraham: A Journey to the Spirit of Three Faits. Quite good and very informative.

43. Do you like Coke or Pepsi more?
They’re the same to me.

44. What is one thing you miss about your past?
Gee, where do I start? How about that some of my "friends" back then didn’t need to act pretentious and be overly materialistic?

45. Did you ever see the school nurse?
A few times. By the way, my high school’s nurse is my best friend’s mom.

46. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?
I’m ambivalent about it.

47. What is one thing you’ve learned about life?
I’m not the world’s axis. No one is.

48. Are you jealous of anyone?
Eh, Jealous is such a strong word. I have great admiration for very talented and creative individuals.

49. Is anyone jealous of you?
I couldn’t care less if anyone is.

50. Ever been stuck in an elevator?
God, yeah

51. What does your dad call you?
Aty, which is a nickname I only allow my relatives to use.

52. What does your mom call you?
Aty.

53. What does you hair look like right now?
Kinda spikey and disheveled

54. Has a friend ever used you?
Yes

55. Ever been involved in a trial?
Only on videogames. ^_^

56. Has anyone recently told you that they like you?
Nah. I’m such a loser. Hahaha!

58. Is your hair naturally straight or curly ?
It was curly but I don’t know how I got it straightened.

59. Ever been called white trash?
Why would I? I ain’t white and I don’t live in a community that calls people "white trash"!

60. Who was the last person to drive with you?
My brother (we took turns driving yesterday)

61. What are you lookin forward to?
I’m all stoked to learn animating with Flash 8. I want to see Bourne Ultimatum.
And I’m still on queue on my friends’ Harry Potter Book 7’s lend to list.

Also, I can’t wait for the year to end. I’m going to spend a couple of week’s vacation on Manhattan (again).

Spell your name without an E,S,H,I,M,A -
ishameh (blech!)

Are you available?
I guess

Favorite color?
Green

Least favorite color?
Pink. Yesterday I saw Flowers for Algernon (a book I’ve been itching to buy) covered in neon pink, and that killed my desire of buying the book!

What are you listening to?
Dwele

Are you happy with your life right now?
Average

Favorite Subject?
Inclusive of subjects OUTSIDE school: Literature, creative writing, and web design

Favorite smell?
I don’t know.

How do you make money?
Typing source codes?

Are you outgoing?
Just okay

Do you like Big Mac’s?
I’m a vegetarian.

Do you own big sunglasses?
No

Where do you wish you were right now?
Anywhere as long as she’s with me (and not ignoring me).

What should you be doing right now?
Nothing. I’ve just finished my projects

Do you have a crush on anyone right now?
I sure do!